From my novel: A short piece

The following is an excerpt from a novel I’ve been working on over the past four years. I’d like to share a bit of it with the world. As I enter into completion, I’ll post a few more excerpts, if that pleases you. Please, leave feedback for me, and thank you for your time.

A cool wind caressed my face. My eyes opened. Brightness flooded my world. I found myself embraced by a mattress of soft grass, keeping me warm. Transported to another land, almost. Then, I saw her: myself . She loomed over me, with my own black curls, those startling icy blue eyes. And even so, she seemed… stronger. A shiver went down my spine.  It wasn’t like staring into a mirror- it was more like staring into something that I could have been.

Her (my?) trident slung behind her back. Her skin gave off an ephemeral glow, trodding the line between life and death. She stuck her hand out.

“Well, get up then,” she commanded, in a higher pitch than I was used to hearing.

“Is that what I sound like?” I muttered. The girl grinned a bit, but simply motioned to move my gaze forward. A forest.

“Up, kid. You don’t have much time,” she commanded. “You need to find her.

“Who?” I asked. “Where am I?”

“Elyana,” she stated simply. “Find her.”  Didn’t ring a bell. As if she could read my mind, she responded with “Doesn’t matter. You have to go.” As the sun burnt a fiery orange, the forest called out, waiting. I could almost hear it. Someone… something was waiting for me in there.

“Well then, go!” she (I?) commanded.  The jagged shadows grew. The darkness burbled above me, gaining strength with every step. Wind hummed in my ears. I turned around; she was gone, along with everything else behind me. It was like it had simply fallen out of existence, leaving a gaping white space in the fabric… of well, space. Only the forest remained. One had to wonder, why was I going into this forest? Well, one has to remember, that

a). If you can’t trust yourself, you can’t trust anyone. Seeing this was order from myself, it was probably best to follow and  

b). Seeing as there was no giant exit sign, I figured my answer to leaving was in this forest. And that, above all, kept me calm. I took a step forward. Then another. And as I passed each tree, as the leaves danced in the song of the night, the branches illuminated blue, paving a path towards me. A sweet melody swayed in the wind. The melody grew louder. And louder. And I saw her. Not me, no. A girl, with pigtails, nestled in the heart of the forest. wearing a white dress, embroidered with a golden floral pattern. It could only be Elyana. A face, smooth as porcelain, pale as milk. Yet, she shimmered brighter than the moon itself. Her entire frame seemed to be made out of a fragile glass, as though the simplest touch would shatter her into a thousand pieces. In a sea of darkness, she lit up the woodlands. Her eyes called out, brimming with essence of innocence and hope. Her longing blue eyes gazed upon my own. Almost a reflection. A laughter rang through the entire forest, one brimming with joy, one only a child could make.

“Why am I here?” I whispered. The girl cocked her head. “Elyana, answer me.” In response, she placed her palm up, against the barrier.

“Free me!” echoed the tiny voice, the child’s voice. I placed my palm against hers. Trees began falling. The wind rushed, circling the two of us now.

“You give me life!” the girl bellowed, her voice growing louder, with the rest of her body, maturing into a woman in front of my eyes. “I give you strength!” White hot coils bonded the two of us together. Pain shot up my arm. My eyes watered. Everything was coming in and out of focus. My head throbbed, waiting to be relieved of this horrid sensation. My entire body burned. And then, the blackness began ebbing in, taking me somewhere far, very far away from this forest. Before, I had asked, where I was. Now I knew. Darkness.

Also, this goes without saying, but please don’t steal my work. Have some decorum. Thank you!


4 thoughts on “From my novel: A short piece

  1. Wow, this is incredible! The description is well done and the story line intriguing. Is this the beginning? If so, it’s an excellent hook. Keep writing!


Rant Out with anger, or give us praise

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s